First post: From the Brown Zone

Here it finally is, the blog of the century. Well of the year, at least. Well, the blog of the year for me. My year. 2010. My year around the world.

I’ve begun calling it my “Vision Quest.” You know, it’s that “post-divorce, post-job loss, post-band breakup, post-nervous breakdown, post-everything-bad-that-could-have-happened-happened” sort of thing. Some say I’m just running from my problems, but I say “No, I’m coming back!” And actually my problems are over… aside from unemployment, but it’s not so bad since I have a cushion to fall back on. To travel on, actually.

Yes, it’s a soul-searching trip, but I’m not keeping some sort of self-indulgent Eat-Pray-Love journal here. I’m far too jaded for that at this point. Rest assured if there are any gems of self-insight, epiphanies or other fluffy self-affirmations of that nature, I’ll spare you (and your stomach).

I’m writing this blog to entertain you… to stimulate your senses with imagery, stories, wit, and… my famous brand of sarcasm.

And so let it begin. I’m actually at the beginning. In my parents’ home in Moreno Valley, California. Not far from where I spent the majority of my teenage years working in a candy shop at the mall, driving around blasting grunge from my little car, getting into trouble with boys up at the makeout spot on the hill… okay just kidding about that last part. I was far too unpopular for that

Anyhoo, I’ve been here a week after making my way down from Portland in the rain, and it’s very different from what it was 15 years ago. When I was in high school the only things around were a movie theater, strip malls and a few chain restaurants. And a Sam’s Club. It think that became Wal-Mart at some point I’m not sure. Now there are big box stores and giant shopping malls everywhere. But I digress. It’s insanity, all the big people in their big SUV/Pickup Trucks/Motorhomes going to the big Wal-Mart/Super Target/Super K-Mart/Costco to get their super-size Doritos/Coca-cola/Ziploc Bags/TV’s, driving through the Starbucks (yes, they are ALL drive-thrus here) to get their Venti triple vanilla whole milk with-whip lattes for the ride back to their McMansions.

Okay, sorry to my fellow SoCal-ers for being so judgmental. But it was alarming zipping around in my little Mini, agonizing that there’s no Whole Foods or a Co-op nearby for me to get my organic soy milk and cage free organic eggs.  And nobody was carrying reusable grocery bags. Surrounded by giant SUV’s on the freeway where there seems to be no speed limit most of the time, I drove white-knuckled for an hour to a safehaven I remembered, where sanity can still be found in tiny spots among the strip malls and palm trees: THE OC.

And now I can have my Soy Milk and cage-free boiled eggs for breakfast in the morning. All is well with the world.

Tags: Moreno Valley